Day 57 Aluquerque/ Santa Fe song: Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - U2

I woke up to a text informing me that the rock station in Roswell wants to interview me on the morning show sharing my experiences and offering a hotel room. Unfortunately, I had already left town and was too far away, but that would have been a lot of fun.

I stayed last night with a guy named John. He is the roomate of a guy who knows a girl who knows a guy I know. Swing Connection. He was very hospitibul gave me a nice bed and breakfast and left me with a snack pack for the road. Awesome!

Albuquerque has had some serious radio consolodation. All of the stations are in two buildings and that is it. Radio stations used to be privately owned and small organizations until 1995. The telecommunications act was signed so that people could own several radio stations in a given market and put them all in one building. Then they were run by rich white dudes in New York who were all about sales and business who had no interest in radio. This marked the beggining of the end of radio as we once loved it.

I hate to sound politcal. I am not a Bill Clinton hater. I appreciate him serving our country and he did some terrific things. Which I would thank him for if I ever met him. But then I would grab him by his FAT neck and stare him in the eye and demand he apologizes to the world for signing the act that ruined one of the greatest contributions to culture in our society.

Needless to say, my efforts to get in these large radio buildings were futile at best. Receptionists don't care to help a brother out. They were never jocks, they don't understand. I left Albuquerque feeling unsuccessful. So I stopped on by the Albuquerque Temple for a moment of peace. Every moment in New Mexico is a moment of peace, but even more so when you are at the temple. I love its beauty, its solitude and color. It compliments the land like most of the southwest does. I had some good strong feelings that I am on the right path.

I then found I had an encouraging e-mail from Jeff the General Manager in Columbus Ohio, telling me not to give up, That I am a talented man and that I will find good work and I will do great in the business. Boy! did I need that. Especially from a guy so powerful in the radio industry.

Its a funny thing. In my life, I have delt with serious self confidence issues. I never believed I was any good at radio, guitar, vocals, TV, Writing or anything I did. I only felt that I was good in fooling people who didn't know better. Before I took this journey, I still had some of that in me. I still doubt my self constantly. But now, I fully believe I could do great things in radio. That I could become an extremely valuable asset to any market. But oddly enough, for the first time in my life, nobody is giving me a chance. When I didn't believe in myself, everyone else did. Now that I do have faith, well, nobody is giving me the chance. Thats ok, I will march on.

Just after that I recieved a phone call from my Mother. She informed me that I got a letter from a radio station and an application from a station in Amarillo Texas. If that isn't a kick to the pants, nothing is. I don't know for sure what it means to have an official application overnighted to your house, but imagine its not a bad sign. I believe the Trigga Man was right when he told me the most intriguing point of the journey should be at the nexus where the journey crosses. Which is Amarillo. America's arm pit. But, beggers can't be choosers, the market size isn't too small, I may learn to love it yet.................................please kill me.

Santa Fe has great stations, I dropped off my stuff there. At least the receptionists are nice. But of course, program directors are ALWAYS at a meeting or out to lunch no matter when you show up. Thats ok, I do what I can.

I spent the rest of the evening driving to my friends Megan and Geren's home in Aztec, where I have another lead to follow. Its nice to have a good couple to stay with, we shared stories and had some laughs. I can't believe how blessed I am to have the people in my life. I don't know how I got this lucky in my life, but I sure do appreciate it.

scripture: TBD